Twilight

Saying that Mormon women love Twilight is akin to saying the sun will rise tomorrow. The only caveat is that Mormon women would want to see the sun rise on their sparkly diamond-skinned vampire lover boy Edward.

The Twilight books provide several outlets for Mormon women. For tweens and teenaged Mormon females, Edward represents the apex of Mormon manhood. He is ridiculously good-looking, chiseled, smart, and resists all of his love Bella’s pre-marital sexual advances. For middle aged Mormon women, he represents all of those same characteristics absent in their husbands, although they have now become the ones resisting their husbands’ post-marital sexual advances.

There is a certain, less quantifiable subset of Mormon women who more closely identify with Jacob, a hot-blooded werewolf who is part of the central love triangle that exists through most of the Twilight books. Members of “Team Jacob” (who can be identified by a shirt with that iron on patch purchased in conjunction with the Special Edition of Eclipse) like his wild and reckless abandon, and fantasize about finding a wild “Jack Mormon” boyfriend that has that certain “Jacob” charm, that they can tame and then possibly dump as soon as he is 8 months into his mission.

Note that many Mormon men have also read Twilight. While they will say that they did it to be sounding boards for their wives or “To see what all the fuss was about”, most of these men enjoyed it, but will never, ever admit to it publicly. You will notice them, however, in the corners of a room, nodding knowingly as their wives debate the minutiae of important plot points of the books.

It should further be noted that in Relief Society reading clubs, it is considered poor taste to choose the Twilight books as the book of the month, as all Mormon women aged 11 to 60 are already expected to have read it.